Well see how long my add runs in this direction.

Anyway, I was fooling around over there and what started as an experiment just may become the new *official* page for my latest music jaunt. http://smallestgiant.weebly.com

I know I mentioned a set list here but I’ve already done it there so… And it’s just covers anyway!

We’ve got 4 shows under our belts (5th one is tomorrow night) so we’re still pretty young. Actually though, in “band years”, we’re probably 9 or 10. LOTS of bands NEVER see 5 paying gigs! I guess I can feel good about that… & keep on truckin.

Anyway, here’s an interesting page from the FairTax proposal:
http://www.fairtax.org/site/PageServer?pagename=calculator

But enough of that yucky yuck. The World’s Smallest Giant is getting ready for the world’s smallest gig and it just might change the world (in the smallest way of course). We will be sporting, you guessed it, the world’s smallest PA so… that has me concerned from time to time. Oh, while I’m at it- no party is too small for us to entertain so email me and we’ll get there. We’ll play for 1 person even (as long as we still get paid mind you). We also do arenas… I’m just sayin, you know.  Times are hard. Gotta scrape up that tax money! Once our first full set is in stone I plan on posting it here. Sometimes things don’t work out according to plan though so don’t hold me to it.

Anyway, I like our duo/band/whatever name: The World’s Smallest Giant! Think of all the jokes you can squeeze out of that fancy moniker!

Anyway, the barefeet band thing is over (it was an interesting diversion while it lasted) and now I find myself learning 50 new songs on the acoustic for future gigs. I have the first one booked already for 12/11… before I have the songs down even! So that’s a good sign right? I hope they don’t mind me using a notebook for most of the set. Once things settle in I’ll probably post my new set list… It’s nothing special but it does look eclectic at this point. I need more funny songs!

it seems so sweet and soft
as it trickle, trickle hums
dappled, rippled, smooth and safe
never breathing while it runs

never breathing, never sleeping
ever moving, ever creeping
with the rains, ever leaping
with the drought, ever seeping

in the river life is maddening
under the surface nothing’s smooth
hustled, jostled, often saddening
no room to move for being moved

silt and trash and broken branches
rocks and dirt, snakes and fish
bang me violently forward
to what I dread and wish

and once we’re in the river
no escaping, no way out
no sympathetic whisper to
free us from belief and doubt

ever churning, ever yearning
cutting through the towns and fields
moving faster, even faster
than our frantic spinning wheels

always hungry, always hungry
starving glutton chewing air
at the feast with diarrhea
spewing, spitting in despair

and in the end there is an end
crashing hard against the rocks
remember when we dove right in
remember when we cursed the clocks

ah but the river looked so peaceful
from the boring river side
who knew it would run so wild and
take so much before we died

Last week we added another new song to the lineup. I can definitely handle learning one a week- those 4 & 5 song weeks were HARD. New song: “In Da Club” and I’m getting sick of regurgitating offensive lyrics with a hick accent so I rewrote the entire thing. It’s definitely more funny now. I would post the new words but they’re also dumb. Well, here’s one of my favorite bits… it’s from a farmer’s pov. “I hate to put out that scarecrow / but I can’t have them birds you know / I wish I never saw that show / where the scarecrow came ALIVE!” For some reason the thought of a scaredycat, redneck farmer just tickles my funny bones.

Oh, I realized I never told where we were playing the first show so… May 2nd, 8PM, Bandito Burrito in Madison. It’s free and we’ll be in the 3rd section (2nd bar sort of). It’s fairly “kid friendly” so my whole family will get to represent. Hopefully my kids won’t be scarred for life!

My overalls are getting bleached even now. Next weekend will be mud & oil staining time. I really hope I can get some video to post here after our first outing.

And in other news- our church has had noon service & lunch everyday this week and I have yet to miss. It has made me skip gym time but this is a special week (and it’s free lunch for goodness sake!). I’ll just have to double up workouts next week. Seriously though, I have thoroughly enjoyed this calming, mid-day break. I wish we did it all year long. Maybe then I’d stop sinning so much?

nothing is worth nothing when you’re talking to me
that’s what she told me over the phone
when we hung up I didn’t know nothing means
nothing at all is going to bring her back home

so when you ask what I’ve been doing these days
nothing much… nothing much
and if you want to know how I feel these days
nothing much… nothing much

much ado about nothing is still much ado
just another hole in the old vacuum
and when nothing’s all you’ve got, it’s quite a lot to you
it takes a whole lot of nothing to fill this empty room

she don’t know how much nothing she was worth to me
I miss her empty eyes and her hollow touch
and I can’t blame myself without her help sadly
but now she’s gone and I miss her nothing much

so when you ask what I’ve been doing these days
nothing much… nothing much
and if you want to know how I feel these days
nothing much… nothing much

Oh, here’s something new- it looks like our cover band has a working name now (Mud Cats) and we have our first show booked for May 2nd. I even almost know all the songs. Now I’ve just got to get my new overalls prepped (they look waaay too clean).

I know, I wa$ over$implifying matter$. But this is a stupid blog (mainly a musical one at that) so what’d you expect?

Here’s a funny twist- guess who’s most worried about US economic stability? Yep, China. The very communist nation that held hands with it’s hypocritical western partner while we square-danced ourselves into a corner (a corner up on the ceiling mind you). Now we’re both wringing our hands and throwing ideals to the wind in public. I guess prophet Puff Daddy was right when his bloodshot eyes rolled back and he uttered the timeless words “It’s all about the benjamins!” Maybe he’ll come out with part II this year “It’s all about the Yuan!”

I should throw in a quick disclaimer- I just looked over what I’ve written and it seems like I might know a bit about what I’m talking about but I really don’t. Just keep that in mind. Oh, and think about that the next time you listen to a politician. That and… it’s never a bad time to start learning a foreign language!

Anyway, I’ve got to get back to my own personal financial problems. An issue I can actually do something about.

Honkey Donkey (or Shonkey Donkey)
Hillbilly Disco
Possum Party Posse
Uncle Daddy Cousin
Electric Tractor
White Trash Hero
Bare Foot
Funky Farm Fresh
Popcorn Hole
The Catfish Hunters
Shotgun Wedding Singers
Almost Inbred
Bad Teeth
Hay Ride Disaster
The Big City Boyz
Don’t Tell Mamma
Mad Cow Dance
Spandex Overalls
Cane Pole Disco
Redneck Riot
Yer Cousins

Master Pete seems almost ready for a sophmore effort but lower case nate is still fighting for air in his current situations. Maybe a month or two will provide some time gasps and the sky will move once again? I really hope so!

I haven’t posted any “confessions” in a while so…

I confess that:

1. I am in bondage to sin and I can’t free myself
2. I can’t beat my 11 year old daughter at tennis on the Wii
3. Even after the “toenail” incident, I still don’t clip them properly
4. I sin in thought, word and deed- things done and things left undone
5. I am still uncomfortable around naked people
6. I am not humble enough to use cheap toilet paper
7. Sometimes I hate my neighbors- esp my “neighbor” customers at work
8. I don’t help my wife around the house enough (or “AT ALL” sometimes)
9. I’m not making headway with my bad habits
10. I distrust dentists & doctors & diagnosis to a sinful level at times
11. I eat too much salt and I LOVE IT
12. Sometimes I’m GLAD everyone dies
13. I’m a horrible steward (will you take a check?)
14. I’m a bad friend… ah, just listen to the song
15. I have too much pride and not enough shame
16. I think I secretly blame God
17. I am religious with routines that have nothing to do with religion
18. I am irreligious with most religious activities
19. I probably chew my food too much
20. I probably cause others to stumble (or maybe I’m just being egotistical)
21. I don’t care enough about history (or maybe I don’t trust it?)
22. I often despise the gifts of existence and time
23. Lately I feel like a bum (again, despising what I’ve been given)
24. I am lazy and stupid
25. I’m too self-absorbed and fearful to type a few confessions so you’ll have to guess them
26. I don’t practice on the guitar like I should
27. I watch too many movies (and like too many that I shouldn’t)
28. I lack compassion for jerks (except when I’m the JERK)
29. I’m lagging in compassion for the mentally ill
30. I will still use software that I didn’t pay for (I’m clean on this puter right now but…)
31. I hold others to a higher standard even though I think I don’t and…
32. I think I hold myself to a higher standard than I truly do
33. I’m a sinner and a hypocrite and there’s no hope for me outside of a complete and utter merciful salvation based on grace alone. Period.

Well, that was different! Here’s the post that sort of helped kick this off: link.

That Ash Wednesday thing can sort of stick with you… Watching and hearing the death sentence pronounced on everyone marching slowly to the alter in a mass funeral procession. And for a moment, for a few minutes, some grave perspective is restored. I can’t help but think of the slow, bittersweet shock I absorbed when I first discovered “Dust In The Wind” by Kansas and listened to it over and over through headphones in my bed at night. I still think it’s an impressive song btw. Here’s a version of the video (the original is just TOO, ya know, um… well here’s the original).

Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return.

It’s funny- I’m like “I remember that everyday!” But there’s something about sealing this feeling in the liturgy that is both unsettling and comforting at the same time. Like a weird validation where I can stand up and say “I’m not crazy! I wasn’t crazy or clinical at all- I just get stuck in Ash Wednesday every once in a while!”

In the mean time, I’m still learning tons of words for the cover band thing. That’ll take your mind off death for a little while! (Doesn’t really put your mind in a “better” place but it’s a distraction.) Ah, what do I know, maybe it is a “better” place? Living in memento mori 24/7 might be hazardous to my health? Memento vito sounds kind of redundant (outright stupid even) but…

Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return.

It’s funny. Life has a way of applying overwhelming pressure when you’re healthy. But when you’re sick, truly sick, I’m talking “sick unto death” sick… those bills that seemed like unconquerable giants aren’t even important enough to make it into the conversation. The stupid feuds and fights and misunderstandings lose all relevance. And the important things spring up a layer. Relationships. Love. God.

I haven’t posted in a while so I’ll let this stand and hit the old “Publish” button. Don’t die till yer dead! And…

Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return.